by BooParry | Sep 22, 2015 | #Undone, Books, FaithJourney, Series
At six o’clock I woke up to a life I loved. By eight thirty it was gone.
-Michele Cushatt, Undone*
Have you had an experience like that? One moment, your life was just peachy. Sure, there were little things that bothered you, worried you, or annoyed you at certain times. But for the most part, you were pretty pleased with your life. You were pretty satisfied with yourself. Then, very unexpectedly, everything changes. The life that you knew and were comfortable with – is gone. You lose your sense of control. You lose your sense of security. What is the first feeling that attacks you? For most of us, I’m guessing that feeling is fear.
For me, it didn’t happen in one moment like it did for Michele. It happened over the course of a few weeks. I was struck with fear. I’ve had bad days before, of course, but this was different. I knew, at the deepest part of my being, that I was entering the “unknown.” I didn’t know how long it would last. I didn’t know where it would take me. I didn’t know what the future held. For a perfectionist who likes to have things planned out, there were too many unknowns. Michele put it so precisely: “I prefer to plot and plan, save and stock up.” That was me. Yet here I was. God was leading me on a path I was not prepared for. I was overwhelmed by fear.
For months afterwards, one single thought consumed me: I want to go back. I want a time machine that can take me back to before everything changed. I want a “do over.” I don’t want to walk this road of unknowns anymore! Please, God, take me back.
Yet, I couldn’t. He wouldn’t. It was out of my control. I also knew, without a doubt, that God had me on this road for a reason. Never before had I been so certain that I was right smack in the middle of God’s will for my life. Funny, I’ve spent many years as a Christian. I always wanted to “get” there…to a place where I knew for sure that I was in the middle of His will. I finally reached that place…which happened to be a place of utter despair and brokenness. How ironic is that?
The day cancer showed up in my life, God showed up bigger. He served up a portion of his presence, enough for one day. Enough to reassure me I’m not alone.
How I can relate. I wanted answers and instant fix. Instead, God gave me Himself…just enough to help me through, one day at a time. He gave me the same assurance He gave Michele: I am with you. Trust Me.
I knew that the road ahead was going to be rocky…and long. I had (still have) no idea when it would end. A huge part of me still wanted to just go back. I missed the knowns, the comfort, the security. In front of me, all I could see was a mountain, a Goliath, a battlefield. It seemed too BIG to face. Yet, God wanted to show up bigger. It would be through this road (not around it), that I would truly experience and know – that I am not alone. He is with me.
And that was enough…for that moment, that day.
One side note: I often compare my undone experience to hers. Hers was cancer, mine was something entirely different (not health-related) that I’m not prepared to disclose. I didn’t want to scare any family member who may be reading this.
*All the quotes used in this post are from the book Undone by Michele Cushatt. This is part of a series of posts I’m writing about her book. I will write about what God is having me reflect on after each chapter. You can just read my posts, or you can join the online book club I started. Read my Invite post and Getting Started post to find out more about the book club.
This post was reflecting on Chapters 1 and 2.
Discussion Questions for the book club:
-If you ever had a similar “undone” experience, what were some of your initial thoughts and feelings?
-How did God “show up bigger” or how did you hear His whispers in midst of your most pressing moments? Michele used an example of receiving a phone call from someone whom she least expected to hear (which was a sign to her that it was not a coincidence). Do you have a similar example you would like to share?
by BooParry | Sep 15, 2015 | #Undone, Books, FaithJourney, Intros, Series
Welcome, I’m glad that you’re checking this out to see if you’d like to join us on this journey. I hope you decide to do so!
Here are answers to some questions you may have:
What is this about?
It’s basically an online book club. We will be discussing the book Undone by Michele Cushatt. Please see my invitation post on how I came to chose this book and what I hope to accomplish through this book club. I will share a post every week, summarizing the chapter(s) for that week and sharing my thoughts on the content. The rest of you will have a chance to share your thoughts as well, either by commenting on the blog post (under comments) or by commenting on our closed Facebook group Smashing Sandcastle Discussions (please send a request to join the group).
Is it necessary that I purchase the book?
No, but strongly recommended. I will be posting a quick summary of the chapter(s) that we cover on my weekly blog post. You can choose to just follow my blog posts and participate in the online discussions. However, to get the most out of this group, I strongly recommend that you follow along with the book.
Where can I purchase the book?
You can find more info about the book and purchase it through the book’s official site: www.undonebook.com. Or you can purchase through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Christianbook.com.
When will this book club start and end?
My first entry to begin the discussions will be posted the week of September 20. We will cover 1-2 chapters a week. My goal is to finish by end of the year (probably mid-December).
Will this require a lot of time on my end?
No! The chapters are short, and we will cover only 1-2 chapters a week. It should only take a few minutes of your time a week to read the book. I will share just one blog post a week that covers the chapter(s). How much you decide to participate in the online discussion is entirely up to you. I sincerely hope that each of you will take the time to share your thoughts, but you are not expected to do so every week.
Is this group opened to anyone?
Yes! My hope is to create a safe place for all women to share their thoughts and feelings, especially regarding what God is teaching them about their own “undone” experience/process. Please, please, please invite other women you know to join who may be interested.
What if I am not a reader? Or, what if I’d like to read at a faster pace?
Again the chapters are short, and we will cover 1-2 chapters a week. It’s a light load for even a non-reader to take on. If you are a reader, please feel free to read ahead and still participate in the discussion for the chapter(s) that are assigned to a particular week.
Is it necessary that I share about my “undone” experience?
No. You can share as much or as little as you want of your personal life. I personally will not be sharing details of my “undone” experience, because I’m not ready to do so. My goal for this book club is that we would encourage one another on the journey of seeking God’s presence in midst of our struggles or just everyday life. I would like the focus of our discussions to be how to seek God in midst of our struggles, instead of focusing on the personal details of our struggles. I hope that makes sense? If you’re not sure what I mean by “undone” experience, you can read my invitation post. Or you will find out soon enough as you begin reading the book.
What if I am not going through an “undone” experience?
You’re still welcome to join! Perhaps God is preparing for future chapters in your life, or maybe He will use what you gain from this book to help others through their “undone” experience.
OK, so now, how do I join?
Two ways.
1. If you have Facebook account, join our closed Facebook group called Smashing Sandcastle Discussions. Once you are a member of the group, you will automatically receive a notification on your Facebook account when I share a new post.
2. You can subscribe to this blog. You can choose to subscribe to only the book club portion of the blog by going here and checking only the “book club” box.
How do I join the discussions?
First of all, I really hope you do! I don’t want this to just be about what I have to share. I so long to hear your thoughts as well! You can join the discussions by commenting on that particular week’s blog post (under comments) or by commenting on our closed Facebook group Smashing Sandcastle Discussions (please send a request to join the group). You can choose to post anonymously on this blog. For Facebook, it’s a closed group, so only the people in the group will be able to view your posts/comments.
Can I join after the book club has already started (after September 20)?
Yes. These are short chapters, so it shouldn’t take you long to catch up. Or you can just pick up from where we are at the time that you join.
Wait, we’re not done yet!
If you’re planning on joining us, please take a minute to introduce yourself (again, you can do so in the comment section of this post, or in our Facebook group). Share what you’d like to about yourself. Please include what your hope is for this group.
Thank you! I can’t wait to “meet” you and begin this journey together!
If you have additional questions, please contact me at [email protected].
-Maria
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by BooParry | Sep 14, 2015 | #Undone, Books, FaithJourney, Intros, Series
Bringing my perfection to the world does absolutely nothing for anyone. Bringing my imperfection, that’s redeemed by loving a God, gives incredible hope.
– Michele Cushatt
Wow. It just hit me. I almost couldn’t focus on my driving. I had my five-year-old in the back of the van, and we were on our way to buy her some new ballet shoes. I just happened to have the radio on, which was playing a broadcast from Focus on the Family.
This lady who spoke of her unexpected suffering – being “undone” as she called it – described, with uttermost accuracy, the very lesson God has been pounding on my heart for the last two years.
Stop trying to bring your perfection, or even your “goodness,” to the world.
Embrace the imperfection, and seek ME in midst of every imperfection. Experience the truth of “Apart from Me you can do nothing.” In the process, you will bring real hope – the hope that’s only found in Me – to the world.
This is it. This is what I’m called to do: to share this truth to the world, using my own personal experiences. I have this inner longing, this “I can’t hold it back at all” feeling that I’ve not known before. This moment I encountered in the van was what brought me back to yet another attempt at blogging (grin).
This was a life lesson God has been whispering to my heart long before my own “undone” moment came. I mean, just look at what I decided to name this blog when I first began in 2012. Smashing Sandcastle: Imperfect Life of a Perfectionist. Yet, it wasn’t until my “undone” moment happened that I was forced to experience this truth. What I, and I believe Michele, mean by “undone” is this: when your perfect (or seemingly perfect) world is shattered unexpectedly and you are stripped of any false security or your own efforts that you were hanging onto, perhaps even unknowingly. The moment when there’s nothing left in yourself, and the only choice before you is either to be engulfed by utter despair…OR to seek God, more desperately than ever before, and reach out just to touch the edge of His garment for healing. Some of you may know what I’m talking about, and some of you may not. Either way, I hope you will join me on this journey!
Ladies, we are bombarded by the appearances of “happy” and “perfect.”
My friend’s family pictures on Facebook…they look like they came out of a magazine. Wow, look at what their kids can do. My kids have never said anything that sweet to me. Oh look, another display of what her perfect husband did for her…for no reason at all. And what…they are having another baby?
Oh, and let’s not even mention Pinterest.
She made WHAT for her son’s birthday party? How in the world does she have time to be a wife and a mom, make healthy meals from scratch, sew a costume, and still look that good?
I know I’m not the only one who’s had these thoughts!
I’m not saying that it’s wrong to share happy posts…I share them all the time. It’s in our nature that we desire to share our happiness, express ourselves, and be recognized. We want to share about our adventures, our talents, our families, and our accomplishments with the world. Many of us even desire to share God’s goodness through our happy posts.
I come back to the point, though, that we are bombarded by happy posts in the world of social media. More often than not, despite the good intentions of those posting, these happy posts leave some people feeling like they’re lacking. They often feel that their life should be just as happy and perfect, but they are hit with the reality that it’s not. In midst of all the “perfection” displayed in social media, they don’t feel they have anything to share, because their life is the opposite of perfect. I know of a few friends who have gotten off Facebook, because it was too difficult for them to see all the happy family posts, when their own family life was in such turmoil.
Again, I don’t believe happy posts are wrong. My point is, this blog will not be a place that is filled with “look how happy my life is” kind of posts. This will be a place that shares the messiness, the imperfection, and even the unhappiness of life. But it will NOT be a place to just rant and soak in self-pity.
This will be a place…where, in midst of our struggles and mess, we find meaning, courage, peace, hope, and even joy, by seeking God’s presence. I am confident that Michele’s book Undone will help us to do so on this journey. This will be a place where we share how this truth looks like in day-to-day life.
Just look at the Bible. God’s glory, goodness, and grace revealed through imperfect people making mistakes…big mistakes. God always met them in their mess. If the Bible had its own Facebook account, it will be filled with posts of messiness, imperfection, and weakness that are redeemed by encountering the presence of God.
So if you’re in the wilderness, if you have been thrown a curveball, if you unexpectedly found yourself being “undone,” if your life is so imperfect it’s not even funny – you have come to the right place. You will feel right at home.
Here is my plan. We will go through the book Undone by Michele Cushatt, one to two chapters a week (they are short chapters; it should only take a few minutes a week to read). I will share more details on the next post. For now, I want to give you a heads up that I will be starting this soon. Also, I want to give you a head start in purchasing her book, which you can do here. Buying the book is not required to participate in the online discussions; you can follow along and participate as I write about each chapter in this blog. However, I do highly recommended that you read the book with us.
I hope that you will share with other women in your life and bring more people to share in this messy yet transforming adventure!
Let’s bring God’s lasting hope to the world by sharing not our own perfections, but our imperfections that are redeemed by loving God and seeking His presence. I’m so excited!
*If you would like to listen to the Focus on the Family broadcast, you can get to it here. Michele gives a preview of what her book is about.
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