Kisses from God

I’ve been walking with God for about fifteen years now. Over the years, I’ve experienced many “kisses from God” moments, when I’m overwhelmed by His intimate, personal expression of His love for me.

One of those moments stands out more than the rest.

I was living in North Hollywood. I was 23 years old. I had finished my first year out in the “real world,” outside of my Christian bubble. It was not going well. I was barely able to keep up with my bills (let me repeat: I was living in North Hollywood, with an entry-level job). I was not making the best choices. I felt God tugging at my heart, to let down my pride and lean on my parents for a while. I also had an “out of sight, out of mind” attitude towards my parents, and I knew that God wanted me to work on building a stronger relationship with them.  It was time to push the reset button and return to my “home” as a young adult. The problem was, they had moved to Florida during my first year in college. My new home was at the very opposite side of the country.

I loved California. It was the only home I had known since I left Japan. I loved being able to see the mountains from the beach. I loved the cultural diversity. I loved the food! I loved the weather. Most of all, I loved the people. I found the best kind of friends I had ever encountered. I found a family that accepted me as their own. The thought of leaving the people and all the memories was almost unbearable for me. Yet, something inside of my spirit said this was the right thing to do.

I attended a church service for one last time on that Sunday before I left California. My heart was heavy. I prayed to God for some kind of confirmation – or even comfort. I then prayed a very specific prayer. My favorite worship song at the time was “Enough” by Chris Tomlin.

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

I knew this was true…but I wanted to hear it and sing it as part of the last worship service I attended in California. The band began the service with a different song, and I waited for the next song…then the next. When I saw the band members depart from the stage after the last song, I was a little disappointed. I sat down on my chair and tried to focus on the rest of the service.

And then… (I have to pause here for a moment. As I currently sit at Starbucks typing this, my heart is full and I can’t stop the tears when I think back on this moment).

Two members from the band returned. One brought out a cello (the other member may have had a guitar, I can’t remember). They sat. In a very still moment, one began to play a beautiful melody from the cello, and the other began to sing the most treasured lyrics of my heart. So softly. So gently. So beautifully. I could not even stand from my seat. I just sobbed, and sobbed, and sobbed.

God, I am so sad. I know I will be so lonesome for my friends here.

It’s alright, my child. I will quiet you with My love. I will be with you. You will never be alone.

But this past year – I’ve made some pretty bad decisions. I’m not worthy.

I knew you before you were born. You are ALWAYS precious in My sight, no matter how much you may lose sight of Me.

I need strength and courage to face the unknown. I’m leaving my comfort zone, and I’m scared.

I will be your strength and give you courage. I will bless you for following my path. You will not regret it.

I need You! I need You! I need You!

My beloved, I am here. I will always be here to walk beside you.

I had asked for a simple song. He gave me so much more. He turned it into such an intimate, sweet, sweet moment. After 15 years, I’m well aware that this is how He works. He loves to exceed my highest expectations.

Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us— to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.  -Ephesians 3:20-21 (HCSB)

Well, as you can probably imagine, the move was hard. It took some time for me to get over the loneliness. But eventually, I found a new home. Not only that, I met my husband, and we started a family here in Florida. This is now a life and a home that I can’t imagine being without.

My single friends: I encourage you to not miss these kisses that God throws your way. When your heart is truly seeking Him, He WILL answer your call. He loves to lavish you with these sweet kisses. There is also no greater season to experience these kisses than now. It’s not that they won’t happen once you’re married – but there will be so many other responsibilities and distractions that can keep you from enjoying these moments to the fullest.  This is such a special time for just you and Him – and nobody else. He loves to take advantage of this season and keep the kisses coming. Don’t miss them. When you learn to seize and enjoy them, they will forever be imprinted on your heart.


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